Tuesday, October 16, 2012
I have realized that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is.
My eyes grew heavy, and my heart, even heavier.
The question in my head screamed for an answer. An answer that my heart couldn't give.
Because it wasnt a series of whys and hows. It was a series of whens and whos.
And those answers were never mine to be given out, anyway.
It belongs to Time and are only answerable with time.
In, the meantime,
I have found that the temporary-cure lies in moments.
That moment in between a hectic workday, where you sit with a friend, next to a commercialized lake in a commercialized bit of town, basking in the Surrogate Nature that lies in front of you, in all its polluted glory, breathing in polluted air. And you talk about complete nonsense. You debate about favourite animals actually being the form that you see yourself projecting to the world. For 15 minutes. Maybe 20. 30, if you're lucky. And then you go back to your hectic workday, feeling slightly okay with the routine that followed a wholesome break.
That moment at the end of the day, when you are simply brimming with discoveries, with stories, with realizations - and you took all of that, to meet your favourite person. And you sit on cushy sofas with your feet up, recounting bits and details. And as you came to the Conclusion of the Day, you realized that this moment was just like the favourite animal conversation you had the other day.
That moment when you take a day off and spend it lazing idly by the roadside, with sunshine gazing directly at you, The XX and Jack Johnson playing in the background, chasing cars that rushed by with your eyes. And you realize that most days, you are one of those cars - chasing appointments and other people. But today is not most days. Today, you are allowed to bask under the sun, not worrying and not caring.
Find these moments.
Revel in it.
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