dont think of yourself as an ugly person. think of urself as a pretty monkey.

1) today, my car got hit again. not from the front. this time, Moe got sodomized from behind. It got tailed so hard that my rear bumper came off. Tsk. Im telling you, i didnt fucking do anything. I was parked and this car was going to get into the parking space next to mine and hit Moe from behind. Apa la nasib aku. Haihhh.

2) A month ago, while driving to work, i had the sudden urge to donate a kidney. I would have a kidney less by now if it wasnt because of my parents forbidding me to do "something stupid".

3) Two weeks ago, while driving by the same road in number 2, i wanted to kiss a girl. Like, seriously. Like seriously seriously. Haha. The entire day at work, i couldnt stop thinking about kissing a girl.

Whether or not i did, haha, thats for u to figure out. *winks*

4) The sudden urge for today is to jadi a radio presenter. Siapa nak bawak saya pergi tryout kat Hitz or Fly? Im willing to start from the bottom rung. Saya jadi coffeemaker dulu pun takpe la(my coffee is really good!) as long as i get a chance at making a fool of myself in the ears of the entire nation.

5) You know how ive been totally bitching about the Pointless Bitch no? I havent been hiding the fact that i dont like her. Last weekend, i found out that she has been bitching about me too on her facebook la tapi. This was what was said between her and a friend(an equally pointless one):

"ada ke dia nak lawan mulut dengan aku."

"babe, kau ajak la dia lawan pingpong. mesti dia menang kan sebab dia punya kan extra bouncy."

seriously gila. haha. you wanna bitch about me, but ur focusing on my asset instead of my flaw. sorry la baybeh ur flat as hell. ive known walls bumpier than your chest. haha. tolong la cari point munasabah sikit kalau nak kutuk pun.

6) He and I have decided tak payah kot couple2 blk, kahwin je terus! :D kurang masalah.