MTV Video Music Awards (just because i think, like Russell Brand, i can say whatever i want, and sorta get away with it)

OK, i dont.
OK, that's another lie. I do.
I did lah, at least.

What does Michael Jackson and plastic bags have in common?
They are both made out of plastic and are dangerous for children to play with.

Haa. Ha. Ha.
ok serious tak kelakar.
(i swear it was hilarious when he was still alive)

But when i heard Madonna's speech about MJ,
terus tak jadi nak gelak tak ikhlas.
a little ikhlas tak ikhlas teardrop pulak took its place.
I wasnt even such a big fan,
but that, my friends, was a powerful speech.

And as you can see,
i have a bit of an obsession towards Russell Brand.
(dari last year kot dah blog about him and his statements)

If it was about bashing Bush and Jonas Brother's virginity issue,
this year he went all :

Lady Gaga is performing here tonight!!
How can we celebrate 2009 without that fantastic woman?
Now, there has been lots of mudslingin' and rumor mongering and rubbish, people saying that she's a hermaphrodite.

I think its a disgrace that a woman cannot be successful, sexy and have an aggresive sexuality without people saying "Oh, she must be a bloke."
That is sexist!

And i would like to condemn the male dominated media for their disgusting treatment of this incredible woman.
And if you havent worked it out by now, yeah,
i'm trying to fuck her.

But you cant read those in a monotonic tone!
It HAS to be in Russell Brand's voice,
complete with his accents
and his crotch-enhancing pants attitude yang mcm tgh on 4 different drugs at one go!

Tch.
Russell Brand and his endless provocative statements.
That's why i adore him so much I guess.
(i secretly wish that i'll be able to say something as honest, albeit crude, in front of the world)

Though I'd have to say,
i give +37 Irony Points (WTF?) to Lady Gaga for her speech:
"this is for God, and for the gays!"
(pun intended, i think)
(oh. and that weird red mask thingy she wore to accept her award makes her look as if she works for Alam Flora)

The performances were awesome.
I first made uncalled for bitchy remarks about Pink's perut buncit and ridiculous getup, but i took them back as soon as i saw her swingin' performance!
(Gempak dowh lu. At least we all now know that should the community decide to isolate Pink one day, she can always make a living by joining a circus group)

And Beyonce made me go woo-oh-oh!
The bisexual part in me (under the influence of Brand and Gaga - ok ini tipu lagi sekali. perempuan2, tak payah sms saya sekejap lagi ajak berdating di bawah bulan purnama. tapi kalau anda sangat hot, sila tinggal kan phone number. lepas bulan puasa saya might just call anda blk.) made me shiver and tingle looking at her wiggle and do her African Princess bit.

And one thing that i have to say about Muse.
LOVEEE.

Should i comment about Kanye West's drunken act?
Tak payah kot kan.
Jangan malas sangat, pergi Google!
Hahah.

It kinda looked like a setup to me though.
I mean, shouldnt they have like floor managers and shit to stop him from barging on the stage in the first place?
*raises eyebrow*
ah who cares.

So, yeah,
pardon me for rambling on and on about MTV Video Music Awards.
I was just trying to find an excuse to procrastinate from doing my assignment and studying for my test.


p/s : i think i would be 136 years old, baru Malaysia will have the same standard of awards macam MTV VMA.