God does not change men's condition unless they change their inner selves.

I am the kind of person who cannot handle rejection of any kind. The fear of things not going my way is then used as a cork to stop me from taking any form of action.

For example, i've had the idea to write a story for quite sometime now. I've got the characters and the plot all mapped out, but somehow, out of the fear that i am not able to construct the plot well enough or not being able to narrate the story well to the point that i'm a disappointment to my writer self, i refuse to get started.

I refuse to click on the 'New Document' button and type my thoughts away. It sounds pathetic, yes. Most of the time, i would avoid my problems, half expecting that it will sort itself out if i just leave it there long enough (which we all know is absolute crap). 

I mean, this is hardly a scene in Cinderella where a Fairy Godmother flicks her wand, chants 'Bippity Boppity Boo' and POOF! the pumpkin changes into an obscenely fabulous carriage!

Despite being aware of all that, it's not really a habit I could kick. Regardless of how many times i tell myself that it's better to simply face the inevitable and change along with the circumstance, my entire body will automatically stiffen when the mind gives out the command.

Though, if there's one thing that i learnt this week, perhaps the same shit is happening to you because you keep making the same mistakes in dealing with it. For as long as you refuse to learn from your mistakes, adapt to it and change your ways, your problems will never go away.

And if it provides any additional incentive to get you going, the relief that you get the moment you start taking control of the situation, is completely monumental!

I actually have plenty more to say but at the moment, I'm kind of distracted thinking about how my friends are doing in Egypt. And the fact that the online media restriction that our government plans to impose on us is looking frighteningly like what's happening in Egypt now is of no assurance whatsoever.

Give me a good few hours to finish reflecting. Perhaps then, i will be back to share silly stories instead of talking about life 'revelations' which might have just put a few of you guys reading to sleep already. Tee hee.

Til next time! :)

ini semua gara gara baca perihal politik in the light of the celebration of Independence.

1. bilamasa fahaman dan ideologi terbit secara membabi buta, kesedaran patut ada bahawa we are treading on the wrong track. 

2. bilamasa ketidaksetujuan tidak lagi diiringi dengan rasa hormat, muncul lah golongan golongan lancang yang hanya mahu kan kemenangan, bukan lagi kebenaran.

3. bilamasa aku sudah bicara tentang perihal perihal yang randomly righteous, sudah pasti maksudnya telah sampai waktu untuk aku tidur lena.

:)

About The Boat That Rocked!

THIS MOVIE WAS SUGGESTED TO ME BY DZULHAZMI AND SHAREENA.

If you are at all a universal music lover,
and have no qualms being engaged with the mixture of drugs, alcohol, sex and (of course) rock and roll for about 2 hours,
i believe you'd be in love with this movie the way i am.

I might even say that i love this slightly more than Across The Universe.
And that's pretty big considering, id marry Across The Universe if it were human.

Its the 1960s. And the government has a whole policy against anything other than jazz to be aired on radio. So what this bunch of nuts did was went on a boat, and aired from the middle of the sea.

Radio Rock, was the name of the station. And it was everything that the government despised. To them, its just a platform for hooligans, drug dealers and fornicators.

Their form of rebellion, however, makes everyone wanna rock and roll.

What is more, it is infested with hotties (both male and female),

Tom Sturridge

Sturridge was actually the guy that Stephenie Meyer's fantasized about playing the part Edward Cullen for Twilight. I can see why. Yummy. Too bad they opted for Robert Pattinson instead.

He was the last crew on the boat. Sent to Radio Rock by his mom to learn something new. Oh, and he learnt indeed. Though, it was all very hedonistic in nature. :D

Tom Wisdom

And this is the dude who plays Sexy Mark. I dont really fancy him out of this movie. In 300, he was just another guy who ends up headless. But in The Boat That Rocked, he was like a more irresistable version of Heath Ledger in 10 Things I Hate About You.

Im telling you, the guy is a walking sex god. He doesnt say much in the movie. Just sleeps with an awful lot of women.

January Jones

Well, she wasnt actually in the most part of the movie. But i thought that she was incredibly hot in action. Heheh.

Im not gonna waste any more of my time Googling for images. If you want to ogle, watch the movie. :)

What more, the soundtrack is awesome. A little bit of Jimi Hendrix, The Kinks, The Who, The Beach Boys and many more. Brings you back to the 60s indeed.

It pretty much came down to saying Bollocks to the people who wants to see you fail.
And thats why, its a must-watch!

im a nerd, thats why

who wouldve thought that revising on Malaysian Studies would make me fall in love with Malaysia's visionary, Tun Mahathir.
(to all haters, scram. i dont need you here)

He was intelligent indeed.
And im scared that Malaysia will never again see the likes of Tun M.

When people speculated and questioned his decision to start an organization, producing our own national cars, they said :

"How the hell are we gonna produce cars when we cant even produce something as small as needles?"

He replied:

"If we can produce cars, how hard can it be to produce needles?"

And when everybody else was busy selling out their countries to the IMF (International Monetary Fund), he was dead determined that we could survive without the foreign help. And surprisingly to others, we did.

Instead of succumbing to the Western investors whose plan was to buy our Ringgit many times over, resulting in an increase of our Ringgit value (and thus, giving them the absolute power over our country), Tun tied our Ringgit instead.

Ringgit Malaysia could no longer be taken out of the country (well, they could, but in mild moderation of course) and this pretty much restrained the foreigners from playing with our currency as if they were Play-Doh.

Smart move, indeed. Im scared in behalf of the country if never again will Malaysia's politician be as smart as Che Det was. Im afraid that there wont be a scrap of nationalists in our generation.

Should that prediction ever come true, im afraid i would have to turun padang (cheewah, berangan).

p/s : now Mummy, arent you proud of me for blogging about intellectual issues for once? :)

the day i knew that i have to pay my summons

upon entering the gate of UTP, the uptight guards (yes, the ones wearing the masks nak prevent H1N1) will ask for your matric cards to ensure that you are indeed a UTP student (and not some random probable pembawa H1N1 from UITM nearby).

Today, as i drove by, and knowing that the mysterious guard behind the mask is gonna be annoying and ask us to produce our cards, i slowed down and fumbled with my purse.

He torched the windshield, checking for my nonexistant UTP car sticker (i havent had a sticker for the past 2 years and a half or so, hence resulting in my RM1020 summon total).

Mysterious Guard looked at me while i was still struggling to take my matrix card out from my purse and said "Hey Natasha, Natasha, dari dulu sticker awak tak buat buat jugak lagi..."

*congratulating self*

Tahniah la Sha. You are now on first name basis with the guards. I dont even frigging know how he came to know my name. over 5000 UTPians and about half of them has summon issues (this is a made up statistics) and its my name he remembers.

Must be due to that guard i ran over a few sems back. ;P

cut and paste : Malaysian politicians

George Washington Legend has it that George Washington, America's first president, chopped down a cherry tree in his youth. The story goes that George gives the tree a good swing and chops it down with an axe.

His father sees the damaged tree and asks his son if he knows who did the deed. George is quoted as bravely admitting the truth: 'I can't tell a lie. Pa, you know I can't tell a lie. I did cut it with my axe.'

Now what would some of Malaysia's politician when posed the same question:

Abdullah Ahmad Badawi - 'I did not cut down the tree, I was just taking a nap underneath it.'

Najib Razak - 'I swear that I have never MET that tree.'

Hishamuddin Hussein Onn - '...but I only own a keris, not axe, how to cut down the tree?'

Mahathir Mohamad - 'Apa nama cherry tree, yes, I chopped it down because I don't like the idea of Pak Lah sleeping under it.'

Chua Soi Lek - 'Yes it was me, I resign as caretaker of this orchard.'

VK Lingam - 'It could be me, it might have been me, but I don't think it's me.'

Anwar Ibrahim - 'I did NOT do it, and I am not giving any DNA sample for you to plant on the axe handle.'

Mohd Khir Toyo - 'The new state government should just trim the grass and not waste time asking who cut the tree.'

Azalina Othman - 'The cherry tree is not included under my tourism MOU so I cut it down and besides there were unauthorised signboards put up around the tree.'

Shabery Cheek - 'I challenge you to a debate on tree cutting.'

S Samy Velu - 'I chopped it because Hindraf members were using it as a meeting point.'

Rais Yatim - 'You must see the bigger picture. Ahmad said cherry trees are expensive to maintain. Ali Rustam said that are against our national identity. And I needed to test my new axe. So, you see, it is a WIN-WIN situation all around.'

Karpal Singh - 'The bigfoot creature did it.'

Pandikar Amin Mulia - 'There is nothing in the standing orders against chopping cherry trees......Kinabatangan duduk! Bukit Gelugor duduk!'

Khairy Jamaluddin - I did not do it, neither did the Mat Rempits. By the way, what's a cherry tree?'

Lim Kit Siang - 'Cherry tree also you don't know. You are an insult to Oxford!'

Nazri Abdul Aziz - 'Racist, racist, racist! When we cut down durian trees nobody made a fuss. Now...'

Malaysian Citizens - 'Oh for heavens sake! Somebody plant something before we all starve to death!'

Pardon me for cut and pasting. I thought that this was too funny to be ignored. Ngehh. It seems like this has become quiet the syndrome semasa berinternship. I cant help receiving all the emails in bulks. And more often than not, i found some good really good ones.

So, here goes. Enjoy. :)

how to avoid being heartbroken

1) Instead of waiting to have your heart broken, be the heartbreaker first. The moment you see yourself falling deep, make a run for it. Run, and dont turn around.

2) As soon as the relationship ends, hook up with someone new. It doesnt matter who it is, as long as its not a sheep or a dog. Have as many one night stands as you need to get over the current heartbreaker. Its okay to end up as the asshole who fools around or the cheap hussy. Its even okay if you break a few hearts in the process of healing your own.

3) Aggravate the person who broke your heart. Get a makeover and make them drool at how hot you've become. Let them know what they're missing out on. Go on dates where you'll definitely bump into them. Watch in triumph as you see them smack their forehead with the invisible bubble on their head going 'why did i ever let him/her go?"

4) Be as mean as you can afford to be. Whenever possible, try to make their life hell. But be careful not to appear that you are obviously heartbroken. Otherwise this method will get you laughed at instead of getting you a delicious revenge.

5) Do stupid things that will ruin your life. Be a gigolo. Take dangerous chemical substances that others call drugs. Be a junkie. Get wasted every night. If possible, make sure that you contract AIDS / HIV and then try to spread it to the person who caused the heartbreak in the first place.

6) Turn gay.

7) Cry. Eat dozens of chocolates everyday. Eat to fill in the hollow void that they left in your life. Put on 74 kgs. Ta-da! Now you can expect to find an uglier partner(due to your immediate weight gain). You know what they say about uglier people being nicer. :)

p/s: yes, i was just being terribly sarcastic.

the so called adventure

oh yes, beneath the smile, there is actually a bitch lurking under.

please. i dont have the time to entertain your selfishness.
nor do i have any nice things to say about your egotistical self.

oh. kau nak kira marah kau je la?
marah aku kau tak nak kira?
pfft.

thanks for nothing.

Has the war begun?

The MPPUTP election is here.
Normally i wouldnt have given a cat's ass.
Because no matter who i vote for the final result would be just the same.

But for the first time in years, im all hyped to vote.
For once, there are a bunch of people whose goals are not simply to turn UTP into an islamic university.
I have nothing against my religion. Its awesome and all that.
But seriously, there are better things to work on rather than getting people to stop dating at night.

A friend of mine is contesting.
For the first time, i see a free haired spirit running for candidacy.
The sad thing is, these 'righteous' people would go to all lengths to bring her down.
They tell people not to vote for her because she doesnt wear a headscarf.
And they terrorized her posters.

They drew headscarfs on the said posters and wrote under the belt comments like 'Wanna Free Sex?'. Dah la english kau broken, nak sabotage people somemore.
Fucking a-holes.

If you're good enough, you shouldnt be scared when somebody's competing against u.
You're only threatened because you know they're better than you.
You know they have better things to offer.

So dont go around putting other people's posters on fire(oh yes it happened). It just shows that uve got tiny balls. Go run home to Mummy and cry you sad extremists.

Phew. There goes.

Bottom line, Im voting because i want UTP to be a better place once i come back from internship. It has been a coconut shell we're sheltering under all this while.

I think its about time we saw the sky, dontcha think?

Here's to Sofia Shaharom, candidate #9. We're right behind you babe.

Russell Brand's statement that i would put as my YM status if it werent too long.

I saw the MTV Video Music Awards 2008 earlier on today.
All because the roommate nagged me to and i was shit bored.
Hee hee.

There was something that the host said that caught my attention and left me pondering hours after. This was what Russell Brand said (almost!) verbatim.

As a representative of the global community of visa or from abroad(???), i dont wanna come across a little bit biased but could i please ask of you people of America to please elect Barrack Obama. Please!

On behalf of the world! Some people.. some people.. i think they're called racists say America is not ready for a black President. BUT! I know America to be a forward-thinking country right? because otherwise, you know, would you have let that retarded cowboy fella be President for 8 years?

We were very impressed.. We thought it was nice of you to let him go, because in England, George Bush wont be trusted with a pair of scissors.

Oh. And that bit about Sarah Palin. Hah! That got me laughing hard. Imagine that boy literally masturbating with a condom on and actually burying it after. Tch.

Mr Brand was more like a stand up comedian instead of VMA's host. Anyways, back to what i was saying. I think it's real fresh to see politics being talked about and biased upon so openly. Ud never get that in Malaysia.

Try and make that kind of a statement on Anugerah Industri Malaysia(or is it Muzik?) or Anugerah Bintang Popular or Juara Lagu. Psst, thats about all of the award shows that we have in Malaysia right? you'd either get sent off to jail or get falsely accused of doing something that you have absolutely nothing to do with, and then get sent off to jail.

Pfft.

And they say we have the freedom of speech. Tch. Our country is rigged.