Monday, August 10, 2009

in the spirit of wedding bells and friends getting married

  • In the kitchen, has she ever referred to the oven as 'that square thingy'?
  • Does she use the phrase 'you know' more than three times per sentence?
  • Does her credit card statement include a monthly payment to a plastic surgeon?
  • Have you noticed her name tattoed on 3 or more local bikers?
  • Have you noticed 3 or more local bikers' name tattoed on her?
  • Does she regularly compare your love-making capabilities with that of her exes?
  • Has she ever used the word poo-poo?
  • If forced to use it at all, does she choose to spell the word 'sex'?
  • Does her resume include a two-year stint at the nearby brothel?

If you have answered yes to at least three of the statements above concerning your girlfriend, perhaps you should have another think coming before you blurt out your proposal.

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