Tuesday, December 30, 2008

My Life As an Intern

Is this electrics? Or is it mechanics?
Either way i dont care, they both really reek.
Of engine, compressor or even turbine
Just the sight of it all, makes me wanna whine.

I walk up and down the factory aisle
As clueless and stupid as a dumbstruck child
They explain all about welding and X-Ray
and i'm not listening to a word that they say.

:)

chopped up penis?

i had to summarize the injuries in the production line of the company im working in.

so, while googling different types of cut, i found this on Yahoo Answers:

Question:
I got a injury/cut while shaving my privat part ,penis.blood flow from it,injury is deep,i feel shy of consult.

(please abai kan the grammar. Dude's probably from Romania or something.)

Here are some of the feedbacks received:

1)you should see a doctor if you have hair on your penis. there shouldn't be any hair for you to shave off of there.

2)Do you feel shy enough to bleed to death?\

3)Serves you right for being such a pantywaist. If your girl told you it's sexy to jump off a bridge would you do that too? Serves you right for being a pussywhipped little wimp.

4)it would b more embarrassing if you die because of it ....think about it

and my favourite:

5) cut it off so you'll never have to worry about it ever again

honestly, PEOPLE!!!! Give the poor dude with half a penis a break!

LOL. i still cant stop laughing.

Saturday, December 27, 2008






im on a reading frenzy.
i bought all these for like, a hundred, which is turning out more and more worth it with each page i turn.
aaaahh.. books are the best.
i dont know why i need to go out to seek for entertainment.
i'll be a bookworm/nerd now if you dont mind.
xoxox,m
merissa k.



new moon

Ive been wondering.
Will i ever be as unshaken by death the way Isabella Swan is?
Or simply by pondering, am i admitting that I've been reading too much into Stephanie Meyer's words?

Friday, December 26, 2008

Tarik Balik Paan!!! Nak Masuk Neraka Ke? Hahah

I told Paan,
On Xmas Eve, saya naik ke langit ke tujuh.

Dia reply,
So have you met God?

Oh Paan. Sangat tak sesuai.
LOL

p/s: Kalau tak faham post ini, tak perlu buat buat faham. :D

IVAN SYLVESTER GOMEZ


IVAN SYLVESTER GOMEZ


To the person named as stated above, a very MERRY CHRISTMAS and HAPPY FRICKING 21st BIRTHDAY!!!!!

Ivan dearest,
You're one of the people whom i can always ALWAYS count on, no matter what.
And just for that, you deserve all the happiness you can get.

Wait til i get my first salary, ill get u a birthday/xmas present k doll?

Once again, HAPPY BIRTHDAY.

p/s: its about time, go party and hook up with someone hot! 2 years is a freaking long time k van! hahahahahahahah!

Love you loads,
Tasha

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

PEOPLE ALWAYS LEAVE


You cracked a joke, and made me smile
We played kiddie games, with flair and style
Snapping photos, and pillow fights
Fun outings that last, for days and night

But all good things, must come to an end
Guess im destined to lose, such awesome friends
There will be emails, and expensive phone bills
I'll keep in touch, even if it kills

fresh blood

Third Week of Internship.
Im old news now.
Fresh, new blood coming in next week.
*evil grin*

Boss: Colleague, do you want a new intern?
(Colleague about to answer before boss cuts in)
Boss: But what do i need so many interns for? Hmmm. Asyik ambik intern perempuan je, bosan la. Ambik intern lelaki la pulak.

(I opened my mouth to say something when boss's friend said it first )

Boss's Friend: Haaaa. Ambik! Ambik yang handsome handsome sikit. Ambik yang kalau bawak jalan pun tak rasa malu.

Yes. Get the handsome intern in so there will be an eye candy in the department.
And so that my boyfriend will be worried.

LOL.

Friday, December 19, 2008

masturbation

makes you lose your sex drive














no?

blogging

is the new facebook(?)

talking about twilight

It seems that every two blogs that i visit, theres a review on Twilight.
Be it to go gugu-gaga over Edward Cullen(Robert Pattinson)or to talk about their movie experience.

For me, its just like any of the other superhero movies. Superman Batman Spiderman Cicakman.
The only difference is that its not about an alien, or a rich tech-savvy heir to an empire or somebody who's dna is mixed up with a spider's or a lizard's.

The movie is good, yes. It lays somewhere in between Love and Action. I hate the fact that they cut the part where Edward and Bella was making out in her room though.
Beats the purpose.
I still dont know what happened there when he was thrown on the wall.

Guess i just have to wait until my book arrives and find out! Whee! Haha.

The boys dont seem to like it that much tho.
Hmph.

Anyways. I dont think Robert Pattinson was cute. He was just oozing macho-ness. LOL is that even a word?

I think the reason why girls dig Twilight more than the guys do is due to daydreams. Girls fantasize being taken care of the way that Edward takes care of Bella.

Or some shit like that.

Hmph.

I better get back to work. Or not. Haha

Thursday, December 18, 2008

kena pakai jubah kah?

on monday and tuesday, i skipped work.
hey, bukan saja saja! saya ada mc okay!
but then again, bak kata iylia "learn to differentiate between reasons and excuses".

anyways,hari ini,everytime i meet someone, whether its :
-in the office
-dalam lunchroom
-dekat pantry over a hot cup of coffee
-di tepi welding machines yg noisy
-by the smoking gazebo,

ppl kept asking why i didnt come selama 2 hari.

they pondered whether i was really sick(because i dont look it) or i was totally faking it.

im not telling.

"kenapa u tak datang? oooo. ponteng ehh"

Kenapa orang notice? Mereka tak patut sedar existance saya.
nampak sgt saya tak blh mengular kalau mcm ni.
Hahahahahaha.
Pfft.

I think it is salah dua gergasi yg sentiasa berada dengan saya.
Mereka membuat kan org perasan kewujudan saya.
Applies to ketidakwujudan as well.
Bleugh.

Superficial sungguh kamu semua!

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

do you look at the submarine before it sails away?

do you?
do you?

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

anecdotes.

anecdote #1

my boyfriend has been sick for over a week. when we were in the car, just breezing thru the kota damansara toll booth, he told me that he thinks he's dying.

i scoffed at him and told him to stop speaking nonsense.

nonetheless, i remembered the old people's saying that if you dont have the appetite to eat for 40 days and 40 nights, it means ur dying. simpang malaikat 44.

mentally stressing about it, my driving converts to auto-pilot (read more on this on Effie's page).

The next thing i know, i heard somebody shouting HOIIIII violently. i was like 'who the hell is shouting like a hooligan in the middle of the highway ni?'.

I looked around and i realised i drove past the toll booth without taking my transit ticket. i strolled through as if it was a McD drive thru counter and ive changed my mind about ordering.

Embarassed, i tried to reverse the car back to save what was left of my dignity.
I couldnt.
There were too many cars.

So, with a thick face macam ive just put on a clown's makeup, i parked the car by the highway and walked the distance to the toll booth.
I could hear the toll gate guy telling the car that was pulling up to take their ticket about my stupidity.

Me: Emmm bang. Nak ticket.
Toll Gate Guy: Nak ticket? *sniggers*
Me: Yeah.
Toll Gate Guy: Kereta mana?
Me: Emm kat sana. Sorry tadi daydreaming tak sedar.
Toll Gate Guy: nah. lain kali mengelamun lagi ok?

Ciss.

anecdote #2

People say that Malaysians jakun Mat Saleh.
For once, the proof lies before my very own eyes.

A bunch of us were at the flea market at the Curve.
Apparently one of the stalls has a promo goin on.
If you fill in one of their shitty forms, theyll give you a packet of 'gula ketuk'. Its some kind of candy.

So. Ain had to fill in the form when we walked by with Arnaud by our side.
The girl who was handing out forms and candies immediately went googly eyed and went up to him and gave him 3 packets without the hassle of filling in forms.

We walked on and as we passed by the same stall again, the same girl stood in front of Arnaud and i. She said:
"Hey. You wanted to try this candy right? Since you guys are not from here, ill let you have extra packets so u can taste it. Take take. How many of these do you want"

We all stared at her rambling on and on.

At that point, i guess she realized that she was a tad bit too obvious. So she turned to me and offered me free candies as well. As we walked away, we teased Arnaud about it. For once, Nico wasnt the subject of teasing. Hehehe.

Arnaud simply claimed that he doesnt like sugary stuff and will just bring it back to France as souvenirs.

SOLD to the candy lady!

anecdote #3

for no particular reason, my straight hair decided to revamp itself and turned curly.
so, nowadays, i straightened my hair before i leave the house.

this weekend, as i was halfway through straightening my newly washed hair, i heard my straightening iron crackling. like, theres a short circuit somewhere.

not open to the idea of a burned ear and frizzy hair, i switched it off and asked my dad to fix whatever was wrong. he took a look and told me that theres a loose wire and confiscated it from me despite me arguing that my hair was half straight and half curly.

i looked like cruella de ville.

i was dumbfounded. azik laughed his head off looking at the state of my hair. ironically(excuse the pun) he joked about me using the normal iron to straighten the right side of my hair.

and that was exactly what i did.

with his help, i kneeled before the ironing board and entrusted azik not to burn my scalp off.

The result wasnt too bad. Im just glad my dad got my straightener fixed.

:D


Friday, December 12, 2008

why cant we just be malaysians

i had a massive argument on this matter with my dad the other day.
he warned me that i shouldnt discuss it freely unless if i wanna risk kena penggal kepala.

i beg to differ.
perhaps that only applies to his generation.
i believe that our generation is more open to discuss things.
be it crappy things or things that affect the nation.

we were talking about the proposal to open uitm to non-bumi and about Dasar Ekonomi Baru.

In similar arguments, ive pissed quite a few people with my thoughts.
Perhaps i sound like a Malay bigot yang konon kononnya new generation Malay and one who doesnt believe that we need special treatment to get us far.

I wouldnt say that im that extreme.
Who doesnt like special treatment? I cant lie and tell you i dont. I love it when the police lets me off when another guy friend who breaks the same rule gets a RM300 summon. I feel important when a group of us go to the mamak and i get my drink first when others havent even had their order taken.

Please, dont get me wrong. I cant emphasize on this enough, i ADORE special treatment.

BUT.
BUT.
BUT.

i do believe that Malays could probably go further if we dont rely on the special treatment all the time. I have non malay friends who have struggled so hard to excel in their studies and get straight As in SPM but in the end have to fork out lots of money to go to private colleges. Whereas us bumiputras get a few Cs and are still accepted in UITM.

I fear that the schoolkids wont have the drive to give it their all to excel in their studies, knowing that theres always going to be a place for them.

Im not anti Malay rights or anythg like that. No no no. I just wish that itd be nice if we're a tad bit more hardworking in getting what really matters. And that we do things right and not just sambil lewa.

And i hate the fact that we're such racists. Its always:
-Malays are lazy. Chinese are kiasu. Indians ckp berbelit.

Do you remember that part in Spinning Gasing where the Indian guy said "Its always like this. You Malays get all the name. You Chinese gets all the money. and we Indians get the blame."

Why cant we just be Malaysians and get rid of the whole stigma? Itll be nice to really be a nation. But i guess thats just another one of my wishful thinking.

Lunch break's over. Gotta go. :D

HAPPY HAPPY

3rd December marks:

SHARIFAH NADIAH'S 21ST BIRTHDAY!!!!

ive been wanting to write a proper post with pics colour and proper alignment and stuff, but the office is limiting everything on this pc. gahhh.

anyway, thats besides the point.

To my roommate, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

Im sorry this is a tad bit too late.

Im glad ive got the chance to get to know you. You're precious and i had lotsa great fun gossiping and doing stupid stuff with you.

Oh and she's one hot momma!! hahahaha.

love you babe. have a great year ahead.

xoxox,
tasha

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

my bestfriend left me for a palestinian-american

Im not the brightest colour in the pot.
And i dont have janggut.

Maybe thats why my bestfriend went to Michigan with her newfound love and left me here terkontang kanting.

Now im in the middle of a life changing crisis, and she's not around.

I mean yeah theres email and shit. but its just not the same.

Im glad she left her sister behind to come to my rescue.

To MR Omar's daughters,
hafizah and hamizah.
i love u both dearly.

thanks for just being there.
tsk.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

i miss...

i find myself missing things that i used to take for granted.

like, sleeping late at night(or at 9am)
and waking up late(6pm)

i miss utp's bouncy bed(Mum, please buy me a new mattress)

i miss the mamak happy hours

i miss not caring.

i miss both my roommates and the wacky moments in the room

i miss the comfort and familiarity of the campus

i miss connecting to everyone at the ease of a click(oh gtalk!)

i miss my housemates and their half nudity in the house.

i miss dating with my boyfriend di tgh campus (eh wait, that one i dont miss sgt kot. byk busybodies)
but i do miss the fact that i get to see him every single day without fail.

i miss campuszone where each sms is only 1cent. now its 7 friggin cekik darah cents.

pfft.

yeah. and it has only been a week of internship.

suck it up sha.

Friday, December 5, 2008

the pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity.
the optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

ok, nampak sangat aku dah bosan.

im re-typing what i saw on the back of the 2008 calendar.

warghghhghghghghghg. mother-eff.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Dear God,

Its seriously not funny anymore.
As you can see, im not laughing.

Oh please please, i beg you, give it back to me.

I promise i'll be a good girl.

Your humble slave,
Tasha
Sometimes, you need to learn how to give and take.

In any relationship, its not about winning. It's about giving in.
When your rage takes over, it doesnt take much to make the relationship wobble and topple over.

Thats why, you need to take a moment, and let it go.
Just let it go.
Being happy is so much more convenient than being angry.

Perhaps, itll be a start of something much more meaningful.

So, for now, im accepting the apology and the reasons behind it.
And i too, apologise for making it hard on everyone involved.

Love love love.

na-tut

There is this German guy in my department at work.

My boss jokingly called him kedekut over a Toblerone bar. And he asked her what kedekut was.

She told him to write it down on paper and ask his girlfriend what it means.(Assumption: his gf his Malaysian la kot)

To rebart and show off his wide vocab in BM, he asked us back if we knew what na-tut means.

As expected, we went "HUH????"

He then smugly smiled and claimed that he knws words that we dont.

When asked what na-tut means, he said that it means tired and sleepy.

We smiled at each other, and laughed.

"Its NGANTUK laaaaa! not Na-Tut!!"

he smiled sheepishly when my colleagues tried to teach him how to pronounce it.

then he conveniently announced that he had a meeting to go to.

The ENd

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

i dont like not knowing

my roommate took my boyfriend's phone by accident.

so now, he's phoneless.

i'd have to call him via housephone.

the problem is, since yesterday, he wasnt at home.
so i called his hommies. and he wasnt with any of them as well.
(yes yes im an uptight gf. i like to stalk him)

im supposed to go to subang and meet him today.

but i called home, and he wasnt there.
again.
called his friends, and he's not with them.
again.

so, the question lies, where is he?

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

why you shouldnt lie in your resume

OK adik adik. You need to pay very delicate attention to this, and please dont repeat what i did.

I took Intro to Computer & Information Systems (ICIS) about 3 years ago during my foundation year(untuk encik anon yg comment blog saya hari tu, saya dah 3 TAHUN HABIS FOUNDATION YERRR. so kebarangkalian adalah sgt tinggi that saya bukan junior kamu utk dipatronize).

And in ICIS class, we were taught how to use Microsoft Access.
So i can say that i am Access literate. At least Basic tu can laaa.

And so, to appear as if i'm multi-talented and competent, i included knowledge in Microsoft Access in my resume. Little did i know that it was going to be the main(if not sole) reason i got the job.

So, my supervisor asked me to built this database from scratch.

Dengan struggle nya, (and also with the help of Google) i managed to come up with a quite impressive form. Complete with the function to find specific chemical and its behavior when prompted.

And dengan teramat sangat bangganya, i showed it to her.

She said: Oh cool cool. But do you think you can put all this things in tables? And make separate ones for admin and the workers so people cant simply edit? And can you put this button and use this layout (continues to explain).

Dengan hati sedih and a forced smile, i replied: Boleh boleh.

Huhuhuhuhu.

how weyhhh? how? howwW??? how to put tables yang cantik dalam Access?? What are macros and shit? How to use the functions? Waaaaaa benciiiiii. Please somebody, buat kan for me? Or at least give me lessons ke apa. Tsk.

p/s: untuk menyedapkan hati Cik Azhani kita, im doing my internship at Kota Damansara. Its a company that fixes parts of German airlines. Its called Airfoil Services. :D
pp/s: ada lah beberapa jejaka german yg blh tahan kacak. tapi dlm department saya tak ada. jadi boyfriend tak perlu risau. sekian terima kasih.

jerit sampai pekak

i hate it when people say 'thats mean'.

ish. ITS 'THAT MEANS' LA BENGAP!!!!!!

if its that hard to say, then just say : itu maksudnya...

susah sangat ke?????

Monday, December 1, 2008

The Day I Woke Up at 7.

literally being forced out of bed by the parents(at times like these, i regret not renting out a room away from the family), i woke up with a grumpy face.

ohh boy its been a long time since i HAD to wake up early. good thing i wasnt stuck in traffic jam on the way to the office.

I received a few goodluck messages as well as requests to mintak belanja once i get my pay. To Azik, Miza, Iylia, Noin and Nico, thanks for caring enough to text me.

It really did mean a lot.

Thinking of others who are peacefully napping aggrevates me a lil. And to know that this is what life is gonna be like for the next 8 months, it didnt make things any better.

Yeah, work is work, its fine i guess. Oh and the food was awesome!

For fellow UTPians, you might remember Novell? Where you can share folders and shit. yeah, we order our food from there. theres a long list of menu and everything.

ill be having sweet & sour chicken with rice tomorrow and chicken chop the day after that. havent really decided on what to have on thursday though.

ive only been here 8 hours and im beginning to feel that this place is making me a boring person. huhuhu.

im gonna stop now. im boring myself.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

a perfect ending to a not-so-perfect sem

Marking the last night in UTP, we jazzed things up a lil to make it a night to remember.
I never knew that leaving UTP is gonna make me so emotional. But i guess knowing how much fun the people i'm leaving behind are, it makes it that much harder.



That was us all, warming up to the camwhoring session before the real deal. Stereo pumping with lagu lagu membakar, and with my lousy driving skills we finally reached the destination.

Tasha Nad Ain
Zul Azik
Nyet
Arnaud Nico
Sebastien
Zayd Sopek Bijan




. this is me and si cinta hati.


. and this, is everyone of us.

Two mamak sessions and a visit to the karaoke station later, I was as happy as a fly.

It has been such a long while since we've loosen up and had this much fun.
And though it was practically a farewell party, i feel more exhilarated than i've ever felt this entire semester.

Thank you dear housemates,
Thank you boyfriend and his housemates,
Thank you my French musketeers,
and Thank you Zayd Sopek and Bijan.

It was so much fun.
I'll totally reminisce about this and cry time intern nanti.

Sigh.

Now i can drive back home feeling contented.

Hee.

Til next time, sweethearts.

Bye Bye UTP.
(ceyhhh, aku ckp macam dah nak grad je kan.haha)

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

geraaaaaaaaaaam fuck

dah.
aku dah penat.
aku cakap, bukan kau nak dengar.
buang masa aku je.

and memang aku bengang to da max.
sebab tu aku tulis dalam BM.
yes biar bunyi kasar.
pergi mampus aku tak kisah.

kalau kau tak nak dengar orang cakap,
baik tak payah tanya in the first place.
takde la aku sakit hati.

pfft.

dah la.
go rot in hell for all i care.
malas aku nak kisah.

hari ini hari isnin. esok hari apa?

This is Cai.
Everyone, say hello to Cai.

Whenever we hangout with him, the pattern is always the same.

First stop, go makan.
Last stop, main game2 bodoh at CC.






Location: Old Town White Coffee
Activity: Main card(tak bang, kitorg tak judi)



Oh. and this might sound uber mean, tapi for you fellow UTP-ians, have you guys noticed the Chinese Pakcik Terbang who walks back and forth from Ameeth to Sithick and back to Ameeth again every night without fail?

Yea, the one who lights a ciggarette and then falls asleep on the table and the mamak will kacau him and wake him up.

Thats the one im talking about.

Yeah so anyways, i think Cai looks a little like the younger and better looking version of Pakcik Terbang. Ngee. Maaf Cai.


This is us in front of the dingy but cheap CC in Ampang.

This is what its like for orang orang yang dah habis paper. Jobless tak tahu what to do.
Whee!

This post is very pointless sebenarnya.
But what to do, tangan gatal.

:D

i beg to differ

If everybody loves Star Wars,
Then who's going to obsess over LOTR?

OK. Bad metaphore.

What i'm tryna say is that, differences make the world so much more interesting.

If everybody thinks alike, where's the fun in that?

Nothing will be unique and there wont be any variation in anything.

There wont be Facebook, Myspace and Friendster to pick from.
There wont be One Utama, The Curve, Pavilion, MidValley and three dozen other malls to shop from.
There wont be supporters of Arsenal, Liverpool, Chelsea or Man U.
There wont be AirAsia which is a lot cheaper and a lot less comfortable than MAS.
There wont be Mahathir and Pak Lah and Anwar Ibrahim and Barack Obama. There wont even be any leader if everyone is the same.
There wont be anything to choose from.

Thats the beauty of differences.

And even though there are a few downsides to this, like:
-People misunderstanding other people's blogs and think that it is dedicated to them when its not.
-Stupid debates in the parliament which ends up with the ministers calling each other 'Babi' and 'Bodoh'.
-Couples berargue di mamak dengan penuh semangat over Dasar Ekonomi Baru.

when it comes to the bottom of it,
none of these things really matter. It doesnt.
Differences is merely a stepping stone to a more heated conversation.

And though sometimes it ends up hurting people, if we can just look past it, we'll see that we're all standing in the same place, looking at the same direction.

And if you cant see that, than i guess you're just different than i am.

:)

Monday, November 24, 2008

because Paan forced me to

Apa yang kamu lakukan sekitar jam 10.17 semalam?
What was i doing arr? Ohh. Sitting outside RJ deciding that its not worth it to spend so much on covercharge when we can easily go to clubs in KL for free.

apa yang kamu lakukan sekarang?
staring at the screen, looking for a purpose to get up tomorrow. indahnya dunia dah habis exam.

Adakah kamu akan bangun 7.00 pagi esok?
oh pasti tidak.

Orang paling kelakar pernah jumpa?
Zul.

Takut untuk membesar?
Ohh yesss. I wanna stay 20 sampai bila bila. To think that life was so easy 10 years ago, and now it has gotten uber complicated. Gives me goosebumps to think that its gonna be a lot harder 20-30 years from now.

Matapelajaran yang teruk di sekolah?
Geography. I still cant draw the map of Malaysia. Mungkin saya buta jalan kerana saya tak suka Geography. Atau mungkin saya tak suka Geo kerana saya buta jalan. Hmmm.

Kalau anda minum 14 mug bir,apa yang akan terjadi?
Im going to be a nutcase, spilling secrets that are not meant to be spilt.

Tidur dengan pintu terbuka atau tertutup?
Closed. Atas sebab takut orang nampak posisi tidur saya yang pelik.

Bila kali terakhir kamu buat perkara yang kamu rasa salah?
Bila saya memanjat manjat tembok swimming pool pada dinihari sambil ketakutan.

What are you wearing now?
T-shirt "I was voted Best Kisser by your Boyfriend" dan bikini bottom. Please jgn tanya.

What are you listening to right now?
Birds chirping.

Whats your favorite number?
tujuh.

How is the weather right now?
errrr. dingin.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone?
Nicolas.

Merokok?
Errr. Hahah.

Eye Color?
Purple.

Bulan kesukaan?
September! Boleh celebrate birthday!

Apakah movie terbaru yang kamu tonton?
Madagascar 2.

Hari kesukaan?
Friday. Because it states that the beginning of the weekend.

Jika kamu boleh cakap sesuatu pada seseorang,apa yang kamu akan cakap?
Kalau saya boleh ckp perkara itu, saya akan pergi ckp terus dan tak buang masa type perkara itu di blog.

Pelukan atau ciuman?
Kisses

Berkawan lagi dengan rakan-rakan di sekolah lama?
Of course. Ohhh i miss Dura Hani Alya Zafie Iman the TFs and soooooo ramai lagi. I hate the fact that more than half of my schoolmates are all over the globe while im stuck here. Bleughh.

Left-handed atau right-handed?
Right handed. And saya stress bila duduk with a lefty on my right masa test. Susah nak tiru.

Mahu tidur dengan berapa bantal?
4!

Tidur dengan seseorang atau bersendirian?
With someone.

Apa yang kejutkan kau pagi tadi?
Tak terkejut pun. Petang baru kena kejut.

Boleh teruskan hidup dengan tidak merokok?
Haa. Maybe. Maybe not.

Pernah kawan baik kamu buat onar di belakang kamu?
Fizah is the best. She's never done anything worse than not replying an email.

Memilih untuk memberi nombor telefon?
Only to people i know.

Mana lebih suka: McDonalds atau Burger King?
Burger King where i can have it my own way.

Mahu pergi ke Greece atau Hawaii?
Hawaii babyyyy. Not that i need the extra tan.

Hari jadi yang menarik tahun ini?
Boleh la tahan. Hoho.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

heading back home

ive waited for this moment since my first month in UTP.
the moment where ill be leaving this place for 8 glorious months.

no more classes and tests and bloody assignments every other day.
no more making up excuses not to go to class.
no more sakit hati for the lack of social life.
no more watching perangai pelik2.

of course theres the downside of missing zul like a crazy cow.
shit.
long distance.
sigh.

but yeah im looking forward to facing a new environment even if that means being a buruh kasar/photostat engineer.

goodbye scums of guards.
goodbye UTP workers yg tak membantu.
and goodbye mamak mamak yg baik hati. ill miss ur teh tarik suam.

and most of all(no cynicism here)
goodbye ina and iylia(ill see u in KL)
goodbye nad(awesome roommate! no offence noin)
goodbye penghuni bilik no. 3
goodbye azik(the brother i wish is bonded by blood)
goodbye si cekangs: mizah ika izzah deli khai mimi (here's to our crazy studying days)
goodbye semua housemates: wina(bye bye baby) melissa(the house wont be the same)
goodbye koalas yg tinggal nama saja
goodbye three french musketeers: nicolas arnaud sebastien (ill miss you guys but i definitely wont miss those french jokes that i cant understand. long live assholes. hehe)

no goodbyes to Muhammad Dzulhazmi Shaarin because you baby, ill see u each weekend.
:)

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

poor baby

I have just finished watching Juno for the nth time.
And i was suddenly reminded by the unfortunate girl who was infamous for dunking her newborn in the trash can in UTP earlier this sem.
The same girl who's probably doing time as i'm writing this.
Poor soul.

I am just trying to picture how hard it mustve been for her.
She has what i assume (based on the stories flying around UTP) an unhelpful boyfriend whom she couldnt count on.
Imagine what it was like for her when she first found out.

From this point on, everything is based on my imagination. Heheh.

She probably bought one of those cheap pregnancy tests with crappy names from Farmasi Kak Salmah or Vulva Pharmacy. I dont know la kan.

And she was probably squatting on the toiletbowl,trying to pee on the pregnancy stick (which i think must be messy).

Then she would probably be sitting restlessly waiting for the indication to turn a certain colour or show lines(or possibly even hoping for a Barney's face holding two thumbs up indicating that the test is negative).

In the meantime (a few minutes probably felt like forever to her), she would curse herself for the recklessness which led to the unfortunate event. It could probably be:

a) Dammit, i shouldve used the rubber even though it was like picking a nose with gloves on.
b) They should put on the box saying that rubbers are only like, 97% accurate!!! (oh yes, quoting Ross and Joey)
c) I knew i shouldve taken the morning after pills.
d) This is all his goddamn fault. he promised he wouldnt come inside, that fucking asshole!
e) I really shouldve paid more attention during all those sex-ed talks.
f) If this stick shows a positive, im gonna burn that motherfucker's dick!

Or something along the line.

When it did (indicate that she's pregnant) she was probably too busy crying over spilt sperm to execute her plans of burning the sorry jerk who contributed his good swimmers of sperm.

Now, she told him that she was pregnant and he doesnt want to have anything to do with it. And being optimistic, she went on as if nothing was wrong and that the product was faulty. It was just a scare, she tells herself.

Until the morning sickness came.
And she started craving for frog's legs and maggots.
And suddenly her jeans dont fit anymore.
And her problematic skin is suddenly glowing and flawless.

So she went to the doctor to get it removed.
No way is she keeping it.
Gila? Nak kena buang family?

But the gynaecologist told her that she needs 1000bucks for the operation.

She waited around for another two months to get enough money and went back to the doctor.
Which then broke the news that it was too late to get an abortion. She was already into her second trimester. If she went on, she'd be putting her life on risk.

No other choice but to come clean with the parents. And they, coming from a typical Malay background, flipped out. Oh no, they didnt kick her out but they might as well have. Neither the Mom or Dad spoke to her.

So, oh yes, she was all alone.

And then she came back to UTP. Using enormous and gigantic clothes and tudung, she went around hoping that people would think that she's simply fat.

And two weeks later, the baby came without notice.

There she was, back in the toilet again, waiting and sweating and crying, contraction after contraction.

Hours later, the baby came out the way she hoped it would. Quiet and not making much noise. The floor was bloody and wet.

She looked at the baby, scared.
Now now, why isnt the little boy making any sound?
She probably sat there, paralysed and the thought of spanking the baby's bottom to get him to cry never entered her mind.
By the time she got to her senses, the baby was already gone.

Freaked out, she took the baby and threw it in the trash can.

And we all know what happened after that.

If only our society dont discriminate unmarried girls who decide to keep their baby.
Im not saying that sex before marriage isnt wrong. Thats another issue altogether.
But things happen.

it would just be so nice if society is more welcoming.
That way, we probably wouldnt see too many babies napping in dustbins.
Aduhai Malaysian.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

VAB3013

dear Design of Steel, Timber and Prestressed Concrete Structures.

Darling,
I know we have been together for over 5 months now,and it has been great while it lasted.
But im afraid I have to end it.
It's not working out anymore.

The first few months that we got together, it was still alright.
All sunshine and rainbow.
But now, im not so sure anymore.

I cry more than i smile when i'm with you.

Please dont get me wrong.
I adore you and i understand that you just want the best for me.
But i really can't take it anymore.

It's suffocating being in your presence.
If i could pretend and play along, i would.

I tried finding ways to make it easier, but i dont think there's any way out.

I'll see you tomorrow.
For the last time.
To say goodbye for once and for all.

Please honey, i know this might hurt, but please just let me go.
I know you would probably want to drag this longer for another 6months or so.
But i really cant take anymore.
Just let me go and move on.

Im sure you'll find someone better.

I'll see you tomorrow and ill bring all of your stuff along with me and give them back to you.
Please, just let me go.
I'll be forever indebted to you.

Love,
Tasha
exam ID: 26693
tiba tiba rasa menyampah yang teramat sangat.
bleugggghhhhh.

ain kata: tasha dah angau dengan ashraf sinclair

I am swooning over Ashraf Sinclair.

I saw scraps and bits of his wedding reception with Bunga and seeing them in lip-locks on the dance floor and him singing Ari Lasso's bit of that song with Bunga(sorry tak ingat the title of the song).

Waaaahhh.

Kacak.

I dont mind being his second wife, betul.

Maybe i should pull a Memey on Mr and Mrs Sinclair. Maybe i will. Hmmm.

Hoho.

this is a long one, ive to warn you

friends.
like delicate flowers and inseparable pair of velcros.
(pardon my obsession with velcros)

ones that get my insanity
and pardons my vulgarities
always there to back me up
and makes me feel at home

friends have always been an important fixture in my life
theyre the reason awful places become bearable
(like here)

some stay right through the end
some fades out in between
some goes away forgotten
and some makes a point to be remembered

If i were to list one by one out right now, it would be a tad bit impossible. There are friends from school, and uni, and from home, from work, from random places. Yeah, impossible. You'd know if you're one of them.

And though sometimes you cant mix friends from different cliques due to the foreseen awkwardness, you march past that point and live with it anyway.

So, my darling gem of friends,
Here's a THANK YOU hug for sticking by, regardless of the situation.
Id kiss the ground you walk on.
(of course im not expecting you to claim that from me)

Actually upon writing this, i have a very specific point but upon rambling on and on, i kinda forgot. hahaha.

oh well

Saturday, November 15, 2008

unproductive 24 hours

when i fell asleep, it was 3pm on friday.
when i woke up, it was 12pm on saturday.


Thursday, November 13, 2008

word of the day: ridiculouser
how to pronounce: sebut laju laju

usage:
Iylia : paper Mecha i tadi was ridiculous!
Tasha: oh im sure paper Steel i nanti ridiculouser.

superficial

like most of the female population on earth, im conscious about the way i look.

i sometimes think that i look fat.
i know im actually not
but due to *ehem* some "big" issues somewhere,
i look fatter than i actually am.

haha.

and today i discovered that im quite thin after all.
yeay.

sebab finally ada gambar yg tak nampak boobs.
hahahah.

yes, kami budget model kereta.

p/s:
oh saya tahu.
post ni sgt superficial.
thanks for noticing.
hoho.

rambut panjang berjela


same top
different hair
i miss.

ancient age

i wonder:
(i seem to wonder a lot these days, mcm takde kerja lain nak buat.hehh)

at this age, when we like ppl, we flirt.
we text them
we call them
ajak makan
ajak dating
you know, the works.

but for single people at the age of 40 onwards, how the hell do they flirt?

do they send text messages and flirt like we do?
that would be a tad bit disgusting no?
(im picturing my mom receiving the kinds of msges i do and giggling while staring at the phone. ugh)

so. tell me. how.

and bila they go out dating, do they do corny stuff.
do they make out at the end of the day(double eww).

what? what? what?

howwwwwww? aku curious ni. bagitau laaa. huhu.

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

geleng geleng

With the goddamn exam fever attempting to make everyone mentally sick, i cant help but go visit the clinic. Library. Yeah time to put the geek glasses on.

And there, a particular amusing memory revisited me.

I mightve told this story before but lantak ah kan? Its my blog. Biar la nak post 5 juta kali pun.

Besides, im sure you are all familiar with my repetitive nature. Hoho.

So anyways, I was at the ground floor, studying Statics or something that is equally as shitty. Zul was at the other end of the table, revising Islamic Studies.

Out of nowhere, a guy came up to me.

Guy: Hey, you Tasha kan?
Me : Err. Yea.
Guy: Ur the emcee tu kan?
Me : *scoff scoff* Errrrrr. [senyum sheepishly sebab tak tau what to say]
Guy: You study apa ni? When's ur paper?
Me : Ermm. Statics. My paper is on (insert day here)
Guy: Ohhh. U buat course apa ehh?
Me : Urm Civil.

I could sense then that something was pelik pelik. Didnt the dude notice that Zul was sitting right there, staring amusingly at him? I guess he didnt kot because he continued talking.

Guy: Back home u tinggal kat mana?
Me : KL.
Guy: Ooooo KL. I thought so. Which part?
Me : Damansara.
Guy: Oh Damansara! I suka hangout kat sana!
Me : Oh ok cool.
Guy: Later u balik library macam mana?
Me : Im driving back.
Guy: Ohhh ye ke? Baru ingat nak offer a ride back if ur walking.
Me : Oh takpe its okay. [senyum]
Guy: Tadi you datang dengan siapa?
Me : Tadi? Dengan BOYFRIEND i, dia (pointing to Zul yang tgh tersengih goofy)

kwang kwang kwang

Guy: Ohh. Errr. ERrrrrr. Urmmmm. (held out a hand to shake hands with Zul) Dude, sorry i didnt know. Emmm ok lah. Bye.

And he stormed out faster than you can say "Kan Dah Malu".

And we never saw him at the library ever since.

Monday, November 10, 2008

18SX

WARNING : THIS POST IS GONNA BE UBER DISGUSTING.

i was out sending my assignment at 730 this morning.
soon as i was done, i parked the car and walked back to the hostel.
and then i stopped.

there was a monstrous snail(huge!!) taking its own sweet time strolling on the curbside.

and i suddenly wanted to watch.

unfortunately, i stayed for 15 mins just watching the damn thing.
and throughout the time, i kept telling myself that

the snail resembles a vagina. a badly shot one by a crappy porn producer.
as it moves, it even leaves a trail of err discharge.

ugh. its so effing disgusting im telling you.

the point of my story, to you perverts out there,
dont buy porn, keep a pet snail!

:D
.pic courtesy of Ina Basta.
ala dia kan yang suka ambil gambar tu

you'll be mine



yeah, i do like to show off my masculinity behind those giant hahas. XD

Sunday, November 9, 2008

click clock

i cant stop playing solitaire.
damnit its addictive.

if only studying gives me the same effect.
sigh.

Friday, November 7, 2008

dogs

It has been a long time since anything happened in campus.
The most exciting thing would probably be the Mangga Madu makcik from pasar malam finally got a booth at v5 cafe.

Until that fateful night.

Venue: UTP's swimming pool.

It was the 5 of them that night. Lets call em Kartika, Sharifah, Nabilah, Mohd and Zulkifli. Having the sudden urge to go swimming that night, they jumped off the high wall and sat by the poolside, waddling their feet in the water.

Suddenly, they saw two heads bobbing about. They have invited over 3 friends from "Belgium" to share the massive pool with them. The two heads certainly didnt look like the 3. A thought that it might be the security guard made them cringe and scoundered silently so that they will go unnoticed.

It turned out that it was only another couple whom they also knew, Lets call em B and M. So Kartika and the others helped B and M to hop in.

Soon, the other 3 arrived. Elaine Nick and Arnold. :)

So there they were the 10 of them. With goggles and a beach ball. Laughing and chattering to one another.

And 5 minutes after that, they could hear a few suara sumbang. Asking them to leave the pool.

"ADIK! ADIK! KELUAR!" says the guard.

They pretended not to hear, hoping that the guard will finally get frustrated at being ignored and leave.

No chance of that.

After about 10 mins of ignoring the guards, and coming to terms that it's unlikely of them to leave them in peace, they pretended that they were all foreigners who couldnt understand a word of English.

The shouting got worse.

And so the group sent Nick and Arnold to talk to the guards. They started putting their dumb blonde act and pretended not to understand a single word that came out of the guard's mouth.

Guard: What time is it? [Translation: do you know what time is it.]
Dumb Blonde 1: Time? Time? I dont understand you.
Guard: WHAT TIME IS IT?
Dumb Blonde 2: 6? What you're saying? We dont understand.

Then Mr B came to join the two dumb blondes. And they started speaking in foreign language to the guards which was kind of hilarious for the others to watch.

But the guards wouldnt leave. Instead, they called for reinforcements. A few cars and trucks and more motorcycles crowded the pool.

Kartika then heard the guards saying that they wanna come in and take down everyone's name and pics.(which pops the question? what would they wanna do with the pics of people in swimming suits? jack off to them?).

She freaked because if the guards were to come in, they'd be so busted. Couldnt understand BM? Scoff.

And so they made a run for it. Using the backgate, one by one they jumped off the wall and ran to save their life. A very Baywatch moment i might add.

Nabilah and Zulkifli held hands and mastered the arts of pretending to be a couple. Sharifah, Mohd and Kartika on the other hand, freaked out , not knowing what to do. It was like a bad episode of a reality TV show where the cops busted a gang of bank robbers.

A freaky night, thats what they told me. Nabilah and ZUlkifli even got chased by a 'tracking dog'.

For more detailed info about what happened, you should ask the 10 of them. I cant really describe the exhilaration and what they were feeling prior to being chased. Only they know.

And for all you readers, as far as you are concerned, this is just a badly written fiction of someone who's mentally incompetent. :)

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Rasa Mcm Nak Saman Pak Guard!!

For the first time in two semesters, i got held back at the front entrance for not having a car sticker.

Having had to leave the car to get my tickets, i sashayed to the guardhouse in my tank top and board pants.

The pakcik was looking at my nazak matric card, and asked:
"Kenapa card awak ni patah patah?"

I replied:
"Oh. Dah lama dah macam ni pakcik. Dulu kena langgar dengan kereta."

Pak Guard:
"Laa. Card pun awak langgar dengan kereta? Dulu langgar orang."

What else is there for me to say?

Macam mana saya tahu saya banyak sgt lepak kat mamak

Dulu, bila saya sampai mamak, saya akan order teh tarik suam.

Selalunya, lepas tu, setiap kali mamak ambil order, dia terus teka minuman yang saya mahu.
Saya cuma perlu angguk saja.
(and throw in the occasional smile).

Malam ni, saya baru duduk.
Meja belum sempat dibersihkan lagi. Penuh dgn sisa makanan.
Belum sempat nak panggil mamak suruh ambil order,
Tiba tiba mamak datang senyum tersengih letak teh tarik suam depan saya.

Saya kagum.
Mamak ni macam telepathic.
Hoho.

Dan orang lain sakit hati sebab mereka belum sempat order,
saya dah dapat air.

Peace.

p/s: mamak, you rock my socks!

Monday, November 3, 2008

To My Favourite Person In The World


MUHAMMAD DZULHAZMI SHAARIN

Happy 21st birthday cupcake!

Oooooh. Theres a tad bit toooo much to say, i dont even know where to begin.
Lets just say im glad i got to spend all these birthdays of yours by your side.

You're the one,
and you deserve all the happiness in the world.

Awak la Sayang,
Baby,
Bobo,
Cookie Monster,
Raccoon,
Bobby,
Intan Payung Jantung Hati.

Semua lah awak.

I think ive said happy birthday a gazillion times dah kot the entire day.
I hope you liked our little semi-successful celebration.

If i had enough moolah, id name a star after you Ami.
Whee.
Sayang kamuuu byk byk byk.

So, dearest Cookie Monster,
happy birthday again.
I give the green lights for you to go do whatever yg will make you happy.
(As long as it doesnt involve half naked girls)

Thanks for coming into my life.
Please stay.

Here's to a gazillion more years of celebrating bday sama sama ok?
Birthday present nanti claim kat saya ok?

Love you sunshine

xoxoxoxoxxxxxx.
Fithri Natasha Merissa Kartika


the so called adventure

oh yes, beneath the smile, there is actually a bitch lurking under.

please. i dont have the time to entertain your selfishness.
nor do i have any nice things to say about your egotistical self.

oh. kau nak kira marah kau je la?
marah aku kau tak nak kira?
pfft.

thanks for nothing.

Saturday, November 1, 2008

XP

this week has been a torture chamber.
the amount of workload is enough to reserve me a bed in the local mental institution.
so now im out running away before workers from Tanjung Rambutan gets the chance to wheel me away in a stretcher.

so long, suckers.

aku bosan



I was tagged by Wan Nurul Ain Nabilah

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
- id be tempted to poke his eyes with a fork at first. theeenn, id think to myself, heh who am i kidding? aku takde la baik mana pun. so id forgive him. true story. :P

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?
- to be Quickie's host?

3. If you are the opposite gender, what would you do?
- I'd marry my bestfriend, Hafizah Omar.

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?
- i'll be a talkative bitch with lots of money. oh and id definitely get married petang esok jugak.

5. Will you fall in love with your friend?
- already am. :) isnt that so much better than falling for a stranger?

6. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
- loving someone is natural. but having them love you back, thats something.

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?
- wait? dah jumpa dah. nak tunggu apa lagi. the right question should be how long do you intend to get married.

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
- why do i feel like ive answered this already? ill keep on waiting for him like i always do. and eventually, itll work out for me. not being snobbish(okay maybe a little) but it always does. hoho.

9. Have u ever been labeled as a snatcher?
- three times. twice by the girlfriends and once by diri sendiri. moo.

10. What takes you down the fastest?
- bila Zul marah or upset or sedih or emotional. guaranteed waterworks. money back warranty ok. yes im a big baby. pfft.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?
- 30 years old. i would be orang tua yg perasan muda i think.

12. What do you really want at the moment of responding to this tag?
- pergi Penang. and oh, tak sabar nak habis exam.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
- sheeeee isss very sensitive, sgt emotional mcm budak kecik yg comel, she's friendly and full of gossip berguna. she's my housemate so it comes with saying that dia ada lah gembira and very worth knowing. hoho.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
- id really rather be married and rich. :D

15. What's the first thing you do when you wake up today?
- errrr.grab a stick?

16. Would you give all in a relationship?
- i would. at least i feel like i would. ud have to ask him whether he thinks i have.

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?
- i'd pick the person who understands me and are always around through thick and thin. NOT the one who won some reality show or another. :P

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing the someone has done?
- yes i would. unless if u kill my mum or something along the line.

19. What is your feeling rite now?
- mengantuk yang teramat. oh and rasa sedikit miskin. boohoo.

Since the ppl id like to tag has already been tagged, I am tagging:
1) Dzulhazmi
2) Azik
3) Fieda
4) Reeno
5) Rez
6)
Ismal
7) anyone else yang as jobless as i am

orang French gila.

I just got back from McD.

Had a satisfyingly fattening Big Mac. I didnt even get to eat the fries though.
Somebody stole it when i wasnt looking.

Mid-supper, Azik and I went to pick up the Three French Musketeers from RJ. Long story. With their non stop supply of french jokes that i simply couldnt get( i mean seriously, i cant even fake gelak pun) and Sebastian falling asleep on the chair at McD and teasings about Arnaud who got hit on by a gay Malay guy, it was a real something.

On the way back to UTP, we stopped by to put in more petrol so that Ain will be happy when we returned the car back to her. The guys wanted to pitch in.

I was thinking more along the lines of RM3 each but they gave us a 50note.

Zul gave them the change, which they simply refused to take.

Zul and Arnaud was practically fighting in the car asking the other one to keep the money. Arnaud kept repeating
"No no no. U keep it. Its for all those trips to mamak! Please keep it. If u give it back to me im just going to stuff it in my pocket and forget all about it."


We were wrestling in the car to get the money back in his pocket. But when we dropped them off, we saw the stash of money curled up at the back seat.

Ah you silly French people.

I want to be that rich too that i could simply throw away 50RM just like that.

Conclusion is, i hate being broke.

Friday, October 31, 2008

lapar kot

we have to be positive.
and look at life like a bowl full of Mee Ruski.
aaaaahh.

:D

Design of Steel, Timber and Prestressed Concrete Structures

dont freaking pretend that you have a clue.
its just a waste of time.
time's up and
you're screwed.

it's a tad bit too late to talk about remorse now, innit?

and so, i handed in an empty paper.
warghh.

Sing Happy Birthday!

Lets have another round of this.

30th of October


Munirah Zulkifly

Dont ask me how i met her.
Its totally bizarre.
Haha.

To my dearest "madu", here's to phenomenal 21st birthday!
Im real sorry Zul and I missed your birthday celebration.

But we do hope you'll have a great one.


Im really sorry if i was ever a bitch to you.

Sorry berebut boyfriend. waaa.
hehe.
Itu la i cakap, if its any consolation at all, YOU are my favourite madu. Hee.


If id have to go thru all that shit again just to get to meet you, i would.

Haha.
But it would be mucchh better if we met the conventional way.


Anyways. Please, have a smashing year ahead of you.

We'll come back home real soon.

We'll see you then no?


I love you Munieeeeee!





Khairil Khalid
err. Not much to say apart from Happy Birthday.

Like i said, if buat party, dont forget to ajak me.


And uuhh. Sorry for stalking you masa high school. WAhaha.
Im ok now, really.
:D

Please dont just hibernate in your office. Go and have some birthday fun!


p/s: Gambar di kidnap from respective Friendster/Myspace pages. Sorry takde gambar korg. Hee. XD