to you awesome women

Dear Baizulikha and Zalikha,

this is for you beautiful (inside and out) ladies.

Such was Zuleika, such around her shone
The nameless charms unmarked by her alone -
The light of love, the purity of grace,
The mind, the Music breathing from her face,
The heart whose softness harmonized the whole,
And oh! that eye was in itself a soul!

The Bride of Abydos,

Lord Byron

#3 : My Favourite Television Programme

this post is dedicated to Igniz.

the best combination of six people in the entire world

If you've never heard of the show before, I only have one thing to say to you :
WELCOME TO PLANET EARTH.

I grew up watching FRIENDS.
But it wasnt until 6 years ago that i started watching the show religiously.

In UTP, in the beginning of each semester, ill start watching the show from the Pilot episode and work my way through the 10 seasons. Usually, in 4 months, i wouldve finished watching it at least twice.

I mean, what is there not to love?
Exactly. Nothing.

The jokes are out of the world and original.
The characters are all both charming and weird at the same time.
The mere ease of them blending in together with each other.
The way they make you reaching out for tissues at the end of each season.

All my life,
this is all ive ever wanted.
this is all im asking for.

people who are there during the breakups and the proposals.
friends who stick through the fights and the makeups.
soulmates whom you want around you at all occasions.

i can talk about Friends day in day out.
i could make this post go on and on til you would start cussing at me for writing such a long piece that nobody wants to read (which is why, im trying hard not to start talking about favourite episodes).

this is the only TV series that made it 10 seasons and stayed awesome throughout the way.

p/s : i suka The One Where Joey Speaks French. kelakar gila tolong lah.

Selamat Hari Raya! now lets go out and main mercun!

fuh fuh.
tiba tiba teringin nak conform dengan society.

I would like to publicize sesi pemohonan ampun maaf sempena Hari Raya.

I am, by nature, a loud person. To add to the damage, i am also (most of the time) incapable of watching the things i say. As a result, i might have unintentionally (and sometimes, bila tengah bad mood, intentionally) caused you to add your own dosa sebab marah/simpan dendam/maki maki dekat i due to sakit hati. Teramat amat lah sorry kalau ada such a case (which im pretty sure, ada).

And sometimes, the things that i do are incomprehensible to other (more) normal beings. I wont apologize for being myself and jumping up and down and kadang kadang tergelak extra kuat, but i will say sorry if you happen to be on the same table and malu due to my 'tak cover' behaviour.

I'm only human. I make mistakes. And sometimes i break hearts. Sometimes i provoke and instigate others. Sometimes i do impulsive things that may result in tragedies.

For all of that, saya susun sepuluh jari (i still do not understand the relevance behind this symbolism) and Minta maaf dari hujung rambut sampai hujung kaki. Halalkan makan minum i (or if you insist, claim la lepas i dapat duit raya ni).

Selamat Hari Raya.
Maaf Zahir. dan Batin (hanya kepada golongan golongan tertentu sahaja).

Dont indulge too much with raya food yaww! Jangan menyesal di kemudian hari!

Akhir kata, maju lah sukan untuk negara!

to : orang orang jauh

1.2.3.4.5.6

to 7 pretty pretty girls :

when we took the pictures, 

it was only to pass time and be a lil bit in love with ourselves

but that wasnt all we captured.

:)

here's to many many marvelous memories.

*clink*

of friends

for months, i have been in deep denial of people leaving me behind.
the fact that everyone has moved on, leaving me one station behind, was not one that i would like to ponder on for too long.

back in school, to be honest, being a social butterfly was all i dreamed about.
having grown up (in other words, finally chucking that stupid ideology out of my head) i began to realize that im more of a closed-community kind of person.

dont get me wrong.
i would say hi to a lamppost if i passed one by on the street, but when it comes down to it, im most comfortable with specific sets of people.

ive seen people whose friends stab backs and causes problems that to me, are only relevant when related with 7 year olds. to tell you the truth, in my circle(s), such problems are practically nonexistant.

i choose to spend time with people who only gets my quirks and twists, people who knows my flaw but dont use it against me. you can say that i'm choosy when it comes to picking friends, but well, my choice has never backfired on me.

the people who has made my campus life bearable are now going places and getting on with life. our daily conversations will now only be a once-in-a-blue-moon catch-up sessions. and that kinda bums me out.

what are you gonna do about it though heh?

To everyone whom i have confided in, tell stupid anecdotes to, made fun of myself in front, You are life saviours.

And, well, in simple words, I Love You. :)

bisik bisik sebelum terlena

hey!

tahu tak?

just like physical strength, 

willpower tu boleh didevelop.

nak buat the right thing,

nak stay on the right path,

memang uber-susah.

sebab :

nak dapat diamonds

memang lebih payah dari nak obtain pasir.

aku memang lemah semangat

tapi aku lucky,

aku ada kamu.

kamu yang sacrifice macam macam untuk revive balik semangat aku.

(dan kamu yang distance kan aku,

dari syaitan syaitan yang bisik di telinga tanpa jemu)

hey!

tahu tak?

kalau jumpa manusia istimewa

yang boleh pimpin ke jalan bahagia

jangan sakitkan hati dia

jangan sia sia kan peluang yang ada

the path to discovery, and to happiness

is never a straight journey.

(buka mata besar besar, tengok signboard betul betul!

dan bilamasa instinct dah terjerit jerit, jangan jadi ignorant)

hey!

jangan takut takut.

aku tak pergi mana mana.

aku ada, untuk kamu.

p/s : the boat may rock, and it might scare you. but i promise ill be in that boat with you, not once letting go of your hands. ini janji aku, sampai kapan pun. :)

request yang tak tahu macam mana nak tolak

a girlfriend of mine who recently went through a breakup said this to me :

Sha, i dah takde orang nak manja-manja with.

Kalau i nak manja manja, i manja manja dengan you eh?

Kalau i rasa nak kiss, i peck you on the cheek eh?

Kalau i rasa nak yang lain lain, i baca Quran!

-_-'

you are my anti-depressant.

Writing is my theraphy.
Some people shop, some people drink, some people get high.
And I,
I write.

When you, (a crush), first said hello,

I'd come home and i write.

When you, (a friend), helped me find revelations deep in the night,

I'd open my book and i write.

When you, (a stranger), says something witty or does something amusing,

I'd remember and i write.

You, all of you,
You are

my Valium,

my Prozac, 

my Xanax.

For it gives me pleasure to write
and someday in the future,

I'll read all about you (and you and you)

and I'll smile. 

:)

i hate it when this happens

Read this : prologue

Now, read on.

Situation 1

we were at the mamak, and i brought along my assignment (i skemaa woot woot!).

Spot took one look at the paper that i was writing on, and said :

uish. tulisan u lawa la Sha, macam tulisan perempuan!

-_-'

Situation 2

I had a phase when i tried to be girly-girly.

OK. tak la girly mana.

but you know,

i tried the whole soft-spoken approach,

and this was what Timmy said to me :

Eh Sha, apa cakap lemah lembut macam perempuan ni? Tamau jadi perempuan please? Tamau tamau.

-_-'

Situation 3

We were planning on a day out to de-stress after exam papers yang (hampir) membunuh.
And the crowd was supposed to be a bunch of guys and ME!
And Spot said :
yeahhh! first kita tengok movie, then makan sedap sedap, then kita tengok Champions League finals! Tomorrow : BOYS Day Out!

-_-'

Habis aku ni apaaaaaa?

Hasil plastic surgery??

i love my roommate.

this 

was shortly followed by this

weh serious lawak.

lesson learnt :

1) boys are perverts. 'I LIKE IT ON THE CHAIR' proves that you guys will always try to find sexual innuendos in everything you read. Pah. 

2) dont hookup with your roommate, no matter how hot they are. otherwise, they'll tell the whole world that you didnt like it on the bed.

Arsenal oh Arsenal!

Yesterday i bumped into Timmy at the local mamak and he asked me why i havent been updating much on Arsenal .

Honestly, i think it has a lot to do with our horrific loss over Manchester United and Chelsea.
Nak bangga menang dengan Liverpool pun tak boleh, i mean, siapa tak menang over Liverpool kan? *sly grin*

But yeah, i think i lost my momentum because it wasnt like it's enough that your own team disappoints you, your friends would have to join in and make you feel like stuffing a cigarette box of 20 for mocking The Gunners as well.

OK.
Nak dengar cerita?

During the match with MU, i was rushing to catch the game, tapi sebab game start pukul 12 and i only left KL around 1145 or so, terpaksa la dengar BFM punya live commentary (which totally sucked by the way, sebab tak dapat tgk apa jadi and terpaksa rely on the commentator, tapi commentator biased towards MU teramat la sangat nya. menyampah!).

I seriously drove laju gila tak agak agak (kalau dapat saman speedtrap lepas ni, sorry Papa, tak sengaja. heheh) just so i'd get to watch sikiiiiiit hujung hujung game tu pun jadi lah.

And i made it on time. Pecah record drive from KL to Perak tak sampai 2 jam. Dapat la tengok the last 15 minutes of the game.

Now, dah la i sampai dah memang nampak takde harapan nak menang. And when the game was over, my fear was proven. Kalah memalukan. Anyway, as if that was not enough, Mok (who, yes, knowing my luck had to be an MU supporter) who was sitting right next to me, boleh pulak hantar SMS membakar dan menggelakkan kekalahan.

Not one SMS. Not two. Not even three. He sent FOUR.

AND I WAS SITTING RIGHT NEXT TO HIM! Mulut dia tengah bergerak lagi kutuk Arsenal, and at the same time message terus masuk dalam phone, also from Mok, also kutuk Arsenal.

Baik kan kawan kawan i? :)

And dont get me started on the Chelsea game. Dah dah malas nak cakap.
Hehe.
So, yeah, that's my excuse.

But i guess since we've won 5-0 over Porto, and since we're back on the running to win the title, I'm sort of getting my mood back.

I mean, our chance is just as good as Chelsea and MU i think. Out of the 9 games, we just have to make sure that we win one game extra dari MU. And for Chelsea to, i dont know, drop dead. Hahaha.

Tapi, i think it's not that bad lah. Out of the 9, yang paling menggerunkan pun would be Manchester City, other than that, boleh menang kot (ok, i hope i tak jinx it by saying it. hehe).

MU still has to face Chelsea (i dont know who i'd rather have lose. It's really a tough decision).

Look at it this way, after the Burnley fiasco, pundits and critics and even some fans were bashing Bendtner. And he rose from the ashes (cehceh macam phoenix pulak) and did well in the Porto game.

Mana la tau, after this people will start picking on Diaby ke, tiba tiba ambik kau, 15 goal terus. Heheh. Well, it's not wrong to dream kan? :P

gemuk.

ina told me that people share their food for a reason.

"you ingat orang baik hati sangat ke, generous sangat ke nak share their food suka suka? no. it's for a good reason. we get fat, we get fat together!"

buat apa nak get fat sorang sorang?
kan misery loves company.

yeah! gagasan gemuk berkumpulan!
woot woot!

im seeing purple canopies and white bouquets!

my baby is getting married in december!
and i shall be tukang kipas!
wheeeeee.

im hyperventilating sebab excited sangat!

Hafizah,
ever since i promised you my heart and my soul some 9 years ago,
ive been looking forward to this day where you shall be happy with the man of your dreams,
and i will be a (huge) part of that union day.

seems like, after years of talking about this boy that broke hearts, and that boy who's an eye candy, you found your happily-ever-after, after all.
(now its time for us to find one for me jugak! hehe)

Mizah and I will go all Monica, trying to set up THE dream wedding.
(jangan risau sebab we will instill fragments of OUR dream wedding in yours)
and dont worry, no air sirap will be involved.
(for fear of Jamal making stupid statements kat wedding sendiri).

bottom line dia :
aku excited gila sekarang nak design baju bridesmaid. heheh. i love you Fizah!

loads and loads of love,

bak datang!

Weh weh! Perasan tak!
Arsenal punya fans biasanya (BIASANYA ok? itu equivalent dengan USUALLY. bermakna, bukan all the time ok? ok?) sangat hebat critic team sendiri.

We love the team,
we have faith in the players,
but we are also, at the same time, realistic.

Among ourselves,
laju je nak kutuk kebangangan own goal own goal sekalian.
And betapa weak nya defense at times.

Tapi tapi tapi.
Kalau fan lain kutuk,
we will laju laju come to the rescue
(budget Superman padahal Wenger bukannya kenal pun kita!)

Kami realistic.

Bukan mcm fan sesetengah team tu.
Diaorang menang ke, kalah ke, main hebat ke, main macam gampang ke,
Kalau cerita mesti nak paling gebang.

Kata mereka, MU lah yang undefeatable tu (oops, terdisclose nama. sorry!). MU la yang selalu bawak balik piala.

Ah iye!
Humble much, folks?

*grins*

p/s : see you this weekend!

dah balik UTP, confirm la kena start excessive blogging balik!

ya allah.
this is so silly.

i was bloghopping.
and randomly terjumpa the blog of this guy i used to know a loooong time ago.

back then, he was quiet a flirt.
walaupun at the time, dia ada gf.
he's sort of known for his lady-fetish.
and secara tak sengaja, for a brief moment, i sort of got sucked into a minor drama.
(tapi takde la bitchfight tarik tarik rambut ye)

long story la.

but i never so much as talked to his gf pun.
and i kinda stopped talking to him altogether.

adalah dengar update update about him and the gf via kawan kawan.
tapi setakat dengar je la, tak ambik port sangat pun cuz it has nothing to do with me sejak berzaman dah.

i heard from the little birds that some shit came up.
and that shit turned him into a real gentleman.
and he got married to the gf.

and as i mentioned before,
baru beberapa saat yang lalu, i came across both their blogs.

read their rants dated from yeaaaaars back,
and saw their pics together.

upon seeing their wedding pics (dan gambar yang lain lain),
i suddenly realized air mata dah menitik jatuh.
terharu gila babi seeing how loving they are now.
and how grown up they both seem.

to know that he is no longer the childish impish boy i knew,
and that he is now a man who is soooo in love and soooo responsible,
rasa macam 'oh wow, he finally found what he's looking for in life'.

and it made me so happy.
even though it doesnt have anything to do with me.

tonight, they made me realize that even the relationship with the craziest rollercoaster ride pun has the potential to be 'The Real Thing'.

Tolong jangan tanya if it's THAT time of the month, sebab menangis tiba tiba baca stranger punya blog. Terharu okay. This is a beautiful moment! Let me wallow in it.

;)

Kepada Encik X dan Puan Y,
Though you guys may never read this, please note that i am touched by your love for each other.

Yang benar,
Fithri Natasha Merissa Kartika.

update

I finally got my hands on this four books when i went on a book frenzy at MPH the other day.

I have plenty of things to update sebenarnya, but somehow, everything i typed seems inadequate. So the posts all remained unpublished.

And these days, i feel less need to flame morons and more need to vomit all these psychobabbles and talk about life instead.

I have come across so many weirdos and freaks this semester break than ive ever seen in my entire lifetime.

And i do feel the need to share it here, but i just cant figure out how.

Tsk.

Perhaps i should go on a holiday and get out of this writer's block phase.

Im going.
Gone.

'She'

SHe told me that she is heartless.
I think that she is strong willed, independent, and hard-headed.
But she was not heartless.

SHe told me that she is heartless,
because she feels indifferent when confronted with the emotions of others,
and because she does not empathize.

I think it's bullshit.
I think her heart is warm and aglow.
I think she cares, more than she'll admit.

I dont think she is heartless.
And i like it that way.

:)

the revelations of 2009

1. In order to avoid bullshit splattering all over your windscreen of life (oh pelik nya metaphore!), all there is to hold on to is "dont do to others what you dont want to be done unto you". Percaya la. saya tak tipu.

2. Sometimes love can be right in front of you, but you are the one finding excuses to avoid it.

3. And sometimes, what is in front of you is not a lover, but more of an emotional tormentor. But you, YES YOU, are too busy being in denial to realize it.

4. Life makes more sense, and gives you less headache, when you dont spend your time agonizing over every little scrap of problems.

5. Having awesome friends (and by awesome, i mean those who doesnt judge you and those who will be there when you've just gotten your scholarship AND also when you are more miskin than the blind guy who collects money dekat Uptown Damansara) is equivalent to you being able to handle anything that life might inflict on you.

6. Feelings are confusing. Roll with it.

7. It IS possible to feel for more than one person. It is up to you what to do with it.

8. It seems that Manchester United fans received a MU fan handbook upon their christening. This can be seen from their scripted comebacks and arguments with non-MU fans.

9. This season is Arsenal's own goal season.

10. Awesome bands will always have performances in Singapore and skip Malaysia even though in terms of size, Singapore is just as big as Malaysia's toenail.

To be continued.

New Moon and all about the Vampire Craze

Of course it's easy to drool all over sparkly vampires (whose skin, my friend thinks, will only look good on a handbag!).

Imagine if Meyer left Bram Stoker's version of vampire as it is. And if they look like these:

The Salt Vampire in Star Trek

Spike in Buffy the Vampire Slayer

This one looks more like a witch to me, but oh heck!
(credits to Leeber)

I bet none of you would go ga-ga. No one would go to movie premieres wearing 'Bite Me, Edward' tops and go to Halloween parties as the Cullens looking like you just came out from a glitter bath.

And in that case, i think Twilight wouldnt have been made into movies pun in the first place. But then Meyer has already done the damage by making them Adonises and Greek gods and goddesses.

Ok. That's not the point of my story here.

I've read all 4 books in the Twilight saga. And ive seen the movies repeatedly to ogle at the fairytale of a love story (because in reality, not only are there NO vampires and werewolves, but also, you rarely get to see high school kids finding love in its purest form.)

Oh yes, the dialogues recited sometimes make me swoon and daydream. And hey, im just a girl, excuse me for liking romance (and yes, Twilight is categorized as romance. bukan adventure, bukan thriller. jangan tipu).

And i do think that some of the werewolves were hotttiiiees. and that Jacob (ntah apa nama actor dia, tak ingat) has 8 packs to kill for (I counted!). And that Robert Pattinson, when he's not looking too pale is quiet good looking.

But that's that. i still think people should not get carried away with their obsession.

A girlfriend, Vicky, told me that a few nights back, she went out to a club with a bunch of friends. There was this girl who was sitting near her (whom, was a stranger).

This stranger got tipsy after awhile and bored the whole table telling everyone how obsessed she is with Twilight. With no warning, she suddenly inched closer to Vicky, and BIT HER ON THE NECK!

Tipsy Girl then claimed that she has some sort of K5 bullshit substance in her blood that enables her to suck blood.

Vicky stood up and punched Tipsy Girl who then fell to the floor, showing no signs of superhuman strength.

Wicked!

Arsenal Vs. Chelsea

now now now.
where should i start.

what about the fact that watching the match was like watching a 'sukaneka for kindergarten toddlers'?

the ball barely penetrated Chelsea's defense and there were too many goofballs horseplaying on the field.
GET A ROOM!

im not dissing my own team, no im not. (I REALLY AM NOT!!)
its just that, i dont want to be a sore loser who blames the ref when its clear that our own attack plan PHAILED big time.

i mean, come on!! what is it with Arsenal and scoring their own goals each time theres a big match?

Nadim said : I rasa Arsenal punya player requirement is that diorang kena reti own goal. tak reti buat own goal, tak boleh main for Arsenal.

wahahahaahah. siot betul.
eh okay okay. tak gelak.

With Van Persie out for 5 months, i dont know how we can survive this season.
No choice but to have faith that Wenger will cook something up soon enough.
I dont get why he refuses to use the money from selling off Adebayor to get good strikers.

Oh. and dont get me started on how slow Eduardo was.
(not that im confident of outrunning him, but it still, im no professional football player)
It's infuriating how EVERYONE outran him. sigghhh.

And i gotta admit, Chelsea's first goal was awesome.
At first, i thought the ball will go over the goalpost.
When it went in instead, i sat there dumbfounded, unaware of what just happened (in denial, more like)

But but but the second goal was truly a disappointment.
I did not expect this coming from Vermaelen.
I didnt take him for the scoring-own-goal kind.
Tsk tsk.

Thats enough disappointed rants to last me throughout the season.
Im getting back to my presentation.
Chao.

edited : i just remembered! did anyone see when Traore did a backflip and landed on his feet! whoah. i think he should just become a gymnast or something.